


bitchboy robert writes a song

by jukebonks



Category: Morrissey (Musician), The Cure (Band)
Genre: contains copious amounts of meat beating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-03-09 17:25:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18921655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jukebonks/pseuds/jukebonks
Summary: it's about time i wrote a morrissey fic. i do not like morrissey so if you do then it's best to avoid this. you have been warned





	1. Chapter 1

once upon a time in the magicall land of SHIT BAY COUNTY in oregon robert smith was sitting on a table writing a song. unfortunately he didn't know what to!!!! write about. he said to himself, "FUCK 

 

he said to himself "this sure is a pickle i've gotten myself into" and then he went to his house and ate a cup of water .then all of a sudden he had an idea for his writing a song! bobert picketd up his phone and went onto tumblr and posed a text post that said "if you are morrissey please come here immediately i   
have to talk to you"   
morrissey saw his post and then went to robert smoths house. he said "yo robbie whats poppin why do you wanna see me" 

robert didnt say anything. he just stepped closer to morriss amd pulled a large steak out of his comically small clown purse. morrisey said "robert is that a steake. what are you doing dude thats murder" and then robert slapped the shit out off morrissey for like 10 minutes. he  
recorded the sounds of meat beating anf morrissey whining and put it on his next album which was going to be called "I Hate Morrissey" until they changed the name to disintegration. it was a blessed day. 

the next day, morissey woke up on the cold concrete floor of robert smiths house with 15 bruises from an intense meat-beating sesh. he went to the local whinery and complained about millenials and his fans who have been trying to murder him for 30 years. then morrissey went to his house and cried for the rest of his life.


	2. epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> johnny marr finds out about morrossey's meat beating and has a nice chat with robert

"HEY ROBERT" said a loud voice from robert smiths door. robert sighed and went to go open it. when he looked outside, it was johnny marrr. robert said "oh god what do you want now"   
johnny said "i heard what you did to morrissey". robert stared blankly at him for a minute before inviting johnny into his gay house. johnny said "about beating morrissey's meat. that was pretty cool i never liked that bitch either lmao."   
robert handed him a cup of tea that he pulled out of his pocket and sat down at his gay table. they talked about how fun it is to make fun of morrissey and then robert sudden;ly remembered something. he said "hey johnny boy did i mention i recorded the whole thing" and then they watched morrissey get beat up. the video was amazing on its own but then johnny marr later got the idea to add clown music to it. it was really funny


End file.
